


Don't want us to lose what we are

by bellafarella



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Twins, Angst, Best Friends, Boyfriends, Explicit Language, Fights, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Ian is a year older than them all, Internalized Homophobia, Long-Term Relationship(s), Love, M/M, Not Beta Read, Pet Names, Texting, True Love, Tumblr Ask Box Fic, Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-07
Updated: 2016-01-07
Packaged: 2018-05-12 08:17:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,010
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5659231
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bellafarella/pseuds/bellafarella
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Anonymous said: AU where ian and mickey are in high school or college and ians a year older. Theyve been together for a long time but sometimes ian can be a dick infront of his friends/lip one day mickey tells him that hes gonna be gone for the rest or the day or smthg but ians in dickmode so when iggy comes to pick him up at school he doesnt say bye just leaves and then later he realizes micks gone and is like?? Fluff and apologies and love and ian stops being an idiot around other people!!:)</p><p>Anonymous said: High School AU: Lip and mick being good friends while mick and ian are dating and in love:)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Don't want us to lose what we are

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for the prompts, sorry it took so long! Hope you like this!!
> 
> Title from: We Are by Justin Bieber

High school sucks. No matter what. But when you have great friends and a boyfriend like Mickey Milkovich, it’s less shitty.  
  
Mickey’s a junior at his shitty, run down, public school in the south side of Chicago. All of his best friends are juniors, and his boyfriend, Ian, who’s a senior. Ian has his own friends that are in his year, but because his boyfriend is a junior, he spends a lot of time with them.  
  
Their little group of friends (that the girls like to call ‘the squad’) consists of himself, his boyfriend, Lip (Ian’s brother and Mickey’s best friend), Mandy (Mickey’s twin sister), Sully, and Karen Jackson.  
  
  
Mickey has been dating Ian for almost two years now. They started dating when Mickey was a sophomore and now he’s midway through his junior year. He never expected to be happy and in a committed relationship with a guy in the south side but there he is.  
  
  
Mickey and Lip just finished their biology class and are headed to meet up with the gang in the cafeteria for lunch.  
  
“Dude, you cannot fuck her,” Mickey says for the hundredth time since biology class started.  
  
Lip puts his hand on Mickey’s shoulder and says, “She totally wants me! I mean, I can’t blame her…”  
  
Mickey laughs and shoves Lip off of him. Him and Lip met in their freshman year together and he’s the one who introduced him to Ian. They were friends at first before they finally admitted each other that they wanted more and became an item.  
  
Mickey says, “Our biology prof will not fuck you, no matter how blue your eyes are, douchebag,” before pushing the cafeteria doors open.  
  
“They’re nothing compared to yours,” Lip winks at him before they both start laughing. “There’s your boy,” He drags the word out as he spots Ian with some of his football buddies.  
  
Mickey grins and waggles his eyebrows at Lip before they walk in opposite ways. Lip to the rest of their friends, and Mickey to see Ian.  
  
“Yo,” Mickey says when he approaches Ian. He leans down to kiss Ian but Ian leans back a bit, not into the kiss. Mickey just shakes it off, Ian does that sometimes, doesn’t like PDA in front of his football buddies.  
  
“What’s up?” Ian asks him, looking back to his friends, who aren’t even looking at them.  
  
“Nothing, uh, you gonna come sit with us or what?” Mickey asks feeling more and more uncomfortable now. He doesn’t like to hang around Ian’s friends. He feels completely left out whenever he does.  
  
“Nah, gonna stay here,” Ian says. He turns back around at the table and says, “You can go though.”  
  
Mickey nods once. “Alright, uh… ‘m I gonna see you later?” He asks, unsure now if they were still on for later.  
  
“Yeah, whatever,” Ian dismisses.  
  
Mickey just walks away and heads to the table where his friends are all watching him. He sits down next to Lip, and Karen, Mandy, Scully are across from them. “What?” He all but growls at them.  
  
“Man, I don’t know why you let him treat you that way,” Lip speaks up. They all nod their heads in agreement.  
  
“The fuck are you talking about?” Mickey asks turning to look at Lip.  
  
“The way he talks to you and completely dismisses you when he’s with his friends,” Scully says instead.  
  
Mickey looks back at the others in front of him. Mandy says, “You don’t deserve that, Mick.”  
  
Mickey sighs. “He’s not always like that though…” He tries to defend his man. Sure, sometimes Ian acts like a completely asshole around his friends but he’s only like that around them. He’s always super sweet and amazing with him when they’re alone or even in front of Lip and Mandy. “I can be an asshole too and no one ever says anything about that.”  
  
“Yeah, but you’re not like that with him,” Karen adds. “You’ll never dismiss him or act like you’re not even a couple around your friends.”  
  
“He doesn’t act like we’re not together,” Mickey defends.  
  
“Wake up, bro. I doubt the team even knows Ian’s gay,” Scully says.  
  
“I think they know he’s gay, just not that he’s dating a Milkovich,” Lip adds.  
  
“Can we fucking drop this now?” Mickey growls now. They all shut up and Lip goes back into his rant about how the biology teacher would totally fuck him if he tried, but all Mickey can do is think about everything they just said. Does Ian really act like that?  
  


* * *

  
After school, Mickey’s at his locker grabbing the shit he needs to take home.  
  
“Ah!” Lip yells scaring the shit out of him, making him drop some of his books. Lip’s laughter fills the halls.  
  
“You’re a fucking dick,” Mickey yells at him but can’t help but laugh too. He bends down to pick up his books and someone helps him. He looks to see Ian grabbing his math book. They stand back up and he hands him his book.  
  
“Hey, babe,” Ian says with that half smile that always drives Mickey crazy.  
  
“Hey,” Mickey says back gruffly, putting his books into his bag.  
  
“You still coming to watch me practice?” Ian asks taking a step closer and putting his hand on Mickey’s hip. Totally not caring that his brother is standing right near them.  
  
Mickey takes a step back, almost knocking into Lip, and says, “Nah, we got plans, right Lip?” as he looks to his best friend.  
  
Lip notices the hint and nods. “Yup,” He says looking to Ian, “Sorry, bro.”  
  
“Oh,” Ian says softly. “I thought we had plans after practice, you were going to come over.”  
  
Mickey shrugs. He slams his locker door and says, “Maybe next time.” He slings his bag onto his shoulder and says to Lip, “C’mon, let’s go. The girls are probably waiting for us by the bleachers.”  
  
They start to leave but Ian stops him by his elbow. “Wait,” He says.  
  
Mickey turns to look at him and back at Lip. Lip nods his head towards Ian and says, “I’ll wait over there,” pointing towards the school doors.  
  
When they’re alone Ian says, “Are you mad at me or something?”  
  
“Why would I be?” Mickey asks, more accusatory than he intended.  
  
“Babe, just tell me what I did wrong, I don’t have time to just stand here and guess why you’re mad,” Ian says.  
  
“Yeah, you don’t have a lot of time for things,” Mickey mutters.  
  
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Ian asks.  
  
Mickey groans. “Nothing, look, just go to practice. I’ll see you tomorrow or something…” He says trying to leave again.  
  
“Mickey, can you fucking wait a second?” Ian asks louder making Mickey stop.  
  
“What for?” Mickey says back just as loud, turning to look at him. “Hmm? You treat me like I’m nobody around your friends, even around our fucking friends. You’re an asshole to almost everyone but you’d think I’d be different since we’re supposed to be in a fucking relationship. Do your friends even know I’m your boyfriend? Does anyone even know? Apart from our siblings and two other friends?”  
  
Ian’s shocked at Mickey’s words. “I do what?” He asks caught off guard. “I do that?”  
  
Mickey sighs. He says, “Yeah, not when we’re alone or anything, just when we’re around other people. Like today for example, you moved back when I tried to kiss you and you dismissed me completely. It’s like I was talking to a wall.”  
  
Ian takes a step closer to Mickey. He puts his hands on his hips and says, “Baby, I’m so sorry. You know I didn’t mean to do any of that. You know how much I love you…”  
  
“Yeah, I know,” Mickey says, caving to Ian’s apology.  
  
Ian brings his hand up to cup Mickey’s cheek, and bringing their lips together in a soft kiss. His fingers tangle in his hair as he deepens the kiss, his tongue teasing Mickey’s. He pulls back, “So can I please still see you later?”  
  
“Fine,” Mickey says with a small smirk. “We were going to your house anyway.”  
  
“Jackass,” Ian laughs. He kisses Mickey one more time before walking backwards. “See you later!”  
  
“Later,” Mickey says watching him go before turning around and going to Lip.  
  
Lip gives him a look and Mickey says, “Shut up.”  
  
“You cave every time,” Lip says shaking his head.  
  
“The fuck do you know?” Mickey asks.  
  
“More than you think,” Lip says as they brave the cold outside.  
  
Mickey stops him. “And what the fuck is that supposed to mean? Is he cheating on me or something?” He asks, scared now.  
  
“No, Jesus, Mick. He loves you, he does. He just has a funny way of showing it, and it usually comes at your expense,” He explains. “He has a funny way of showing all of us how he feels about us.”  
  
“Whatever,” Mickey shrugs and they keep walking. He pretends like it doesn’t bother him but it does. Ian apologized though, so hopefully it’ll all be okay now.  
  
  
Later that evening, Mickey, Lip, and Mandy are just chilling in the living room. Debbie and Carl are upstairs doing homework, and Fiona and Liam are next door at Kev and Veronica’s. Since Ian was out, Lip was put in charge of the younger two siblings upstairs. He told them to go do their homework and not bother them unless it was an emergency.  
  
Ian gets home from practice, slamming the front door behind him. “Hey, guys,” He says when he sees them in the living room, shoving his hat in his coat pocket. He kicks his boots off, pulling his coat off and hanging it up.  
  
He walks into the living room and leans over the sofa to hug Mickey around his shoulders. “Hey, babe,” He says, kissing his cheek and neck.  
  
Lip and Mandy give each other a look and roll their eyes. Mickey kicks Lip and looks up at Ian, “Hey,” he says with a smile. He then wrinkles his nose and says, “You smell.”  
  
Ian laughs and says, “Wanna join me for a shower?”  
  
Lip and Mandy both make gagging noises and Ian laughs again. “Alright, alright. I’ll shower alone,” He says. He tilts Mickey’s head back and kisses him on the lips properly. He pulls away and runs upstairs to go shower.  
  
“So I guess everything is right with the world again,” Mandy states when Ian heads upstairs.  
  
“He apologized,” Mickey says.  
  
“Yeah till he does it again,” Lip says.  
  
“You guys got a fuckin’ problem just fucking say it. There’s nothing wrong with our relationship. He said he was sorry and didn’t mean to treat me that way. Fuck, he didn’t even realize he was doing it,” Mickey says getting angry. He lowers his voice and adds, “That,” pointing to where Ian just was, “is how he always treats me. Maybe not in front of other people but who wants that PDA bullshit anyway?”  
  
“You do,” Lip and Mandy say at the same time.  
  
Mickey groans. “Fuck off, I do not,” He says.  
  
“You’re not fooling anybody,” Lip says. He gets up and goes to the fridge for more beers.  
  
Ian joins them after his shower. He put his sweat pants on and a tank top with a sweater over, not zipped up. His hair is still wet and is dropping little water droplets on his sweater.  
  
He sits next to Mickey, wrapping his arm around his shoulders. He kisses the top of his head and Mickey says to him jokingly, “Missed me?”  
  
“Always,” Ian says sincerely.  
  
Mickey leans forward and kisses him softly on the lips. Ian kisses him back forcefully before they are forced to pull apart because their siblings don’t want to see them go at it on the sofa.  
  
Ian presses his lips to Mickey’s temple and says, “Love you.”  
  
Mickey smiles at his words. “Love you too,” He says back. Ian finishes his kiss and they bring their attention back to their siblings.    
  


* * *

  
It’s been about a month since Ian apologized for his behaviour and he hasn’t done anything like it since.  
  
He’s been acting like the Ian Mickey loves, and Mickey’s loving every moment of it.  
  
It’s finally spring so they’re able to sit outside during lunch and not freeze their asses off. Everyone on lunch is sitting outside enjoying the, finally, warm weather.  
  
Mickey sees his friends sitting at a bench, a bunch of people around, some even sitting in the grass. “Yo,” He says to them all.  
  
“Hey,” They all greet back. Mandy says, “You going on that run today?”  
  
“Yeah, Iggy’s gonna be here soon. I’ll be gone all weekend,” Mickey explains. He hates doing drug runs with his dad and brothers, but try telling his dad no. He’ll get a fucking beat down and still have to go. So he just says ‘yes’ and tries not to get caught and end up in juvie. “Where’s Ian?”  
  
Sully nods his head behind Mickey. He turns around and sees Ian walking outside with a football buddy and towards them. “Hey,” Mickey says to Ian with a smile on his face.  
  
“Hey,” Ian says back. “You know Tony, right?”  
  
“Yeah, hey,” Mickey says to the guy next to him. Tony says ‘hey’ back. “So, I’m leaving in a bit.”  
  
“Okay,” Ian says with a shrug. He sits down at the bench next to Lip.  
  
“I’m gonna go see Chloe,” Tony says nodding towards a group of girls to his left. “See you later, Ian.”  
  
Ian nods his head at him and turns back to the others. “So what are we talking about over here?”  
  
“Well, your boyfriend was just telling you how he’s leaving soon,” Mandy says to him nodding towards Mickey who’s still standing near where he’s sitting.  
  
“Where you going?” Ian asks looking up at him.  
  
“On a run,” Mickey says.  
  
“Cool,” Ian says dismissively. He pulls his phone out and laughs at something before replying to the text. “Oh shit, I gotta go,” He says after he gets another text. He gets up and says to Mickey, “See you later, yeah?” before leaving.  
  
“Unbelievable,” Mickey mutters. Ian knows that whenever he goes on runs he’s gone the whole weekend. He didn’t listen to a fucking word he just said.  
  
Mickey receives a text from Iggy saying he’s there. He puts his phone back in his pocket and says, “I gotta go, Iggy’s here. I’ll see you guys, Monday.”  
  
“Hey, wait,” Lip says. When Mickey looks at him he says, “You okay?”  
  
“Fine,” Mickey says simply. “I’ll see you when I get back home, Mands.”  
  
“Bye,” She says with a sad smile. They all say ‘bye’ and with that Mickey heads to the car and has to listen to his dad talk about shit he gives zero fucks about.  
  


* * *

  
After school comes and Ian texts Mickey to know where he is. He’s standing at Mickey’s locker waiting when Lip comes by.  
  
“What are you doing?” Lip asks him, scaring Ian a little.  
  
He looks up from his phone and says, “Mickey’s not answering me. You know where he is?”  
  
Lip shakes his head. “You really are unbelievable. He told you at lunch he was going on a run for the weekend with his brothers and dad. You dismissed him again and ran off because something on your phone was more important than your boyfriend,” Lip says.  
  
“Shit,” Ian says, realizing his mistakes. “It’s not that what I left for was more important than him. Nothing’s more important to me than him and you guys.”  
  
“Then what was it? Why do you act like he’s not even your man?” Lip asks, sticking up for his best friend.  
  
“I don’t mean to act like that, Jesus! It just fucking happens okay? I don’t know why! I don’t know what’s wrong with me…” Ian explains.  
  
Lip puts his hand on his older brother’s shoulder. “Are you ashamed of him or something?” He asks.  
  
“What? No! No, of course not,” Ian says.  
  
“Are you ashamed of yourself? You know, of being gay?” Lip asks him seriously.  
  
Ian never really thought of it. He always knew he was different, and when he figured out why it didn’t bother him. He told his siblings and they all still love him. He told the friends he made and even got the love of his life out of it. But when he thinks about it, it makes sense. Maybe that’s why he’s unintentionally dismissing Mickey. He’s dismissing who he truly is because he’s scared of who he is. He’s scared he might not make it as a football player or even be accepted by those guys for being who he is. Even though they know about him and Mickey, it just made it seem easier to blame it on them than on himself.  
  
Lip shakes his shoulder a little and he snaps out of his thoughts. He doesn’t answer Lip’s question, instead they just head home.  
  


* * *

  
Mickey had a shitty weekend. He hates going on runs. He hates being in close quarters with his dad for so long more than the possible threat of going to juvie.  
  
His dad did get busted though so that’s a plus. Mickey wasn’t with them when he got caught. Iggy neither. Colin wasn’t so lucky though, and him and Terry got thrown in jail.  
  
Mickey and Iggy walk through their front door and see Mandy on the sofa in her onesie watching TV. “You’re back, thank God,” She says looking at Mickey.  
  
He goes over to her and sits with her, patting her head once. “Where’s dad and Colin?” She asks.  
  
“Got busted,” Iggy says, putting his bag on the ground near the coffee table. Everything got taken, drugs and money, so the run was a bust too.  
  
“Shit,” Mandy says. “Well, at least you’re okay.”  
  
Iggy hums and heads down to his room. Mickey sighs and leans his head back against the sofa. “You okay?” She asks him.  
  
“Mhm, just tired,” He murmurs.  
  
“You should let Ian know you’re home,” Mandy says.  
  
“The fuck for?” Mickey asks annoyed.  
  
“He realized what an ass he was being and told me to tell u to let him know when you’re home so he can make things right,” She explains.  
  
“Fuck him,” He says. He takes his phone out and decides to text Lip instead.  
  
**Mickey:** _Just got home. Dad and Colin got caught. I’m good though._  
  
**Lip:** _Good. What you doing? Wanna come over?_  
  
**Mickey:** _Nah, tired. I’ll just see you at school tomorrow_  
  
**Lip:** _Alright. Ian wants to know why you texted me and not him when you got home. I told him it’s cause you secretly love me. He didn’t find it so funny._  
  
Mickey laughs. His best friend is a fucking moron. So he tells him that.  
  
**Mickey:** _You’re a fucking moron, and so is your brother. You can tell him I said that he can go fuck himself._  
  
“I’m going to bed,” He tells Mandy.  
  
“You texting Ian?” Mandy asks.  
  
“Lip,” He says as he gets up.  
  
“I’m glad you’re safe, Mick,” She says looking up at him. He bends down and kisses her head before heading to his room and laying down over the covers.  
  
**Lip:** _Damn, someone is cranky_  
  
**Mickey:** _Nah, just woke up and don’t wanna deal with his bullshit anymore_  
  
**Lip:** _I see. Alright, man, well I’ll let you rest or some shit. See you._  
  
**Mickey:** _See ya_  
  
With that Mickey puts his phone to charge and rests it on his bedside table on silent. He strips down to his boxers and gets into bed.  
  
It feels like Mickey just fell asleep when he’s being woken up by someone getting into bed with him. He opens his eyes and sees Ian.  
  
“The fuck are you doing here?” He asks stopping Ian.  
  
His hands and one knee are on the bed, he freezes when he hears Mickey’s voice. He says, “Shit, I didn’t mean to wake you.”  
  
“Well, you did, so you gonna tell me why you’re here?” Mickey asks sitting up.  
  
Ian turns the bedside lamp on and sits on the bed too, looking at Mickey. He says, “I came to apologize but then saw you were asleep so I thought…”  
  
“You thought you’d just sneak into my bed and I’d be okay with that?” Mickey says angrily.  
  
“I sneak into your bed when you’re already asleep sometimes and you’re never upset about it…” Ian says softly.  
  
“Yeah, well, now I am so get the fuck out,” Mickey says dismissively.  
  
“No, Mickey, please. I came to apologize. I’m so sorry I did it again on Friday. I didn’t mean to. I just- I guess I’m ashamed of being gay,” He explains.  
  
“What?” Mickey asks shocked. “Are you saying you’re ashamed to be with me?”  
  
“No, God, no. Mick, I love you so much, and there’s no one else I’d rather be with. I know people would say we’re too young to say shit like that but it’s true and it will always be true. I guess I just never thought of being gay as something to be okay with. I know I tried to be the rock for you and stuff when you realized you were gay and had all your issues with it cause of your dad but I didn’t realize I had my own issues with me being gay. I just kept putting it out of my mind cause everyone is okay with it and I have you and everything. But I don’t know I guess I just felt like being a football player I shouldn’t be gay, and before football there was ROTC, and so gay and the army doesn’t add up either, you know? I don’t know. All I know is that I love you so much, and I’m so sorry for taking my shit out on you even though I didn’t realize I was doing that. Please, please, don’t end us cause of my stupid shit. I don’t want us to lose what we are,” Ian unloads.  
  
Mickey takes Ian’s hands in his, rubbing his thumb over his hand. He says, “I’m not going to end us. Ian, I love you. Just, if you’re having issues with this stuff just talk to me… You don’t have to shut me out because of it, okay? I’m here for you. I’ll always be right here for you.”  
  
Ian nods his head, moving closer to his boyfriend. Mickey brings his hand up to caress Ian’s head, holding him close to kiss him.  
  
Ian strips down to his boxers and they have the reunion they needed after this hellish weekend apart. Ian spends the night with Mickey in his arms.  
  


* * *

  
Ian, Mickey, and Mandy walk to the Gallagher house for Ian to get his shit for school.  
  
Fiona comes down the stairs and sees the three of them walking in the backdoor. “Look who’s here!” She says. “You spent the night at Mickey’s, I see.”  
  
Ian nods and says, “I’ll be right back,” before kissing Mickey’s cheek and running upstairs to get dressed and grab his school bag.  
  
“Coffee?” Mandy asks Fiona.  
  
She nods and fills her a travel mug full of coffee. She thanks her before putting it to her lips and drinking some.  
  
A couple minutes later, Ian and Lip come down the stairs ready to go. The four of them head out with a goodbye to Fiona and head to the school.  
  
Ian throws his arm over Mickey’s shoulder, Mickey smiles up at him.  
  
Lip comments, “So looks like you two are good now.”  
  
“We’re better than good, right babe?” Ian says looking at his man with nothing but love in his eyes.  
  
Mickey smiles up at him and says, “Right.” He looks at Lip and he gives him a small nod, letting his best friend know that he was being honest. Everything with Ian is great.  
  
Ian still has shit to work through but he has Mickey and that will never change.

**Author's Note:**

> Make my day, leave me kudos and comments :)  
> Mwaaa <3
> 
> http://bellafarella.tumblr.com/


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